Forgiveness is a Long Spiritual Practice
I have to say this is true for me. When I’ve been hurt by someone I believed would be my friend or love me, I have found myself to be emotionally broken, brokenhearted, broken in my spirit, and/or filled with sadness or depression.
When abuse of any kind hurts and destroys another, that is an act of pure evil. Evil can and does present itself in many disguises. Disguises of helpfulness, disguises as friendly and caring, disguises of going the extra mile on behalf of others… all these acts look and are intended to be good, and if the behavior of helpfulness stopped at that point of goodness, then no evil would be present. The difference then is reflected in how we treat others when no one is watching, ah, yes, a key element is introduced!
Are you the same person when you are alone as when you are around others… when you know others are watching you… or when no one is watching?
That is a crucial question to ask oneself and those closest to you. Do you know the person sleeping beside you? Do you know the person with whom you share a child? Do you know that person you believed you could trust forever?
In lieu of an analysis, I am going to approach this from a place of forgiveness.
To forgive someone means you may have to repeat the very act of forgiveness over and over throughout the years of your life. This is not a casual thing, as the devil is near. The devil, the evil one, wants you to hold grudges against the person who hurt you, wants you to lash out and hurt them back, or to plot against them. That would be an equally evil act! The devil wants you to replay the injustice of abuse in your mind until you are ready to take action against them yourself! It is an easy thing to slip into the hands of the devil. First of all, you have to recognize him; remember, all good comes from God. Plotting to hurt someone does not come from God; that thought and action is centered in evil, not in goodness.
Forgiveness is necessary in this life of unfairness. We forgive because we need to stop the anger, we need to stop hurting ourselves by ruminating, and we need to forgive because God forgave us for our sins against others.
We've all heard of or know someone who, instead of getting therapy, acts out their rage and aggression on others, and that can have a devastating outcome on those who are targeted. If someone makes you feel uncomfortable even though you don’t understand why, when someone is physically volatile, get away from them; if someone is verbally violent towards you or others, RUN!
Trust your instincts and don’t make excuses or close your eyes to this matter. Be true to God first and true to yourself.
In His hands we live, shalom–shalom.